Part 3
Later that night, as I lay curled in bed, Javier found me. It seemed his wolf was as restless as mine.
He always waited until compelled to seek me out, his wolf driven to a desperate need for contact unless he had me. Tonight was no different. Javier wasted no time stripping away my clothes, covering my body with his own.
We’d shared countless nights like this in the two years since we found each other, but Javier hadn’t marked me. He only came to me in the dead of night, taking what comfort he needed to appease his wolf, then vanished by morning as if he’d never been there.
I allowed it, every time. It was the only way I had him—a way Ivan didn’t. It was the only piece of him I truly possessed.
I cleared my mind, focusing on the sensation of wholeness, of security. I breathed in his scent, felt his skin against mine, our inner beasts connecting.
His warm, large hands moved across my skin, igniting passion and a desperate need within me. His mouth trailed across my body, everywhere but my lips. He never kissed my lips.
His harsh breaths against my neck, his body within mine, made me feel connected to something again—part of him, part of the “Us” I’d always wished we could be.
I clung to him, absorbing every sensation, every touch as he brought both of us to the edge. As he climaxed, he breathed Ivan’s name.
Like a candle extinguished by wind, my warmth and light vanished, leaving me cold and in pain. I was used to it, I thought, but I pushed against Javier’s chest, scooting away from him as far as I could.
“Abalon, I’m sorry,” Javier whispered. I shut my eyes, tears flowing. The pain was worse than ever.
I was a useless mate, unable to even pleasure him without him wishing for another.
“Leave,” I whispered, ignoring the restlessness of my wolf, the snarls of the beast threatening to retract my request.
“Abalon…”
“Please, Javier,” I cried. I wondered if he could smell my tears, if he could hear my heart breaking with each instance of this ritual.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered before leaving my bed as silently as he’d entered.
I cried myself to sleep, as I did almost every night since Javier had become my mate.
But this would be the last night.
It had to be. I couldn’t endure this ache anymore. I couldn’t wish for his love when it was already held by another, someone who could never return it.
Unrequited love, indeed.
Tomorrow, I would not be his to run to. He would have no choice but to accept my decision.
I would not be the substitute the Moon Goddess had ordained.
Let fate go to hell. I would no longer be anyone’s second choice.