XXV

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XXV

Joh Fredersen came to his motherвАЩs house.

Death had passed over Metropolis. Destruction of the world and the Day of Judgment had shouted from out the roars of explosion, the clanging of the bells of the cathedral. But Joh Fredersen found his mother as he always found her: in the wide, soft chair, by the open window, the dark rug over the paralysed knees, the great Bible on the sloping table before her, in the beautiful old hands, the figured lace at which she was sewing.

She turned her eyes towards the door and perceived her son.

The expression of stern severity on her face became sterner and more severe.

She said nothing. But about her closed mouth was something which said: вАЬYou are in a bad way, Joh FredersenвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ

And as a judge did she regard him.

Joh Fredersen took his hat from his head. Then she saw the white hair above his browвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶

вАЬChildвБ†вАФ!вАЭ she said quietly, stretching her hands out towards him.

Joh Fredersen fell on his knees by his motherвАЩs side. He threw his arms about her, pressing his head into the lap, which had borne him. He felt her hands on his hairвБ†вАФfelt how she touched it, as though fearful of hurting him, as though this white hair was the mark of an unhealed wound, very near the heart, and heard her dear voice saying:

вАЬChildвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ My childвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ My poor child.вАЭ

The rustling of the walnut tree before the window filled a long silence with longing and affection. Then Joh Fredersen began to speak. He spoke with the eagerness of one bathing himself in Holy water, with the fervour of a conquered one, confessing, with the redemption of one ready to do any penance, and who was pardoned. His voice was soft and sounded as though coming from far away, from the farther bank of a wide river.

He spoke of Freder; then his voice failed him entirely. He raised himself from his knees and walked through the room. When he turned around there stood in his eyes a smiling loneliness and the realisation of a necessary giving-upвБ†вАФof the treeвАЩs giving up of the ripe fruit.

вАЬIt seemed to me,вАЭ he said, gazing into space, вАЬas though I saw his face for the first timeвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ when he spoke to me this morningвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ It is a strange face, mother. It is quite my faceвБ†вАФand yet quite his own. It is the face of his beautiful, dead mother and yet it is, at the same time, fashioned after MariaвАЩs features, as though he were born for the second time of that young, virginal creature. But it is, at the same time, the face of the massesвБ†вАФconfident in her, related to her, as near to her as brothersвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ

вАЬHow do you come to know the face of the masses, Joh?вАЭ asked his mother gently.

For a long time Joh Fredersen gave no answer.

вАЬYou are quite right to ask, mother,вАЭ he said then. вАЬFrom the heights of the New Tower of Babel I could not distinguish it. And in the night of lunacy, in which I perceived it for the first time it was so distorted in its own horror that it no more resembled itselfвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶

вАЬWhen I came out of the cathedral door in the morning the masses were standing as one man, looking towards me. Then the face of the masses was turned towards me. Then I saw, it was not old, was not young, was sorrowless and joyless.

вАЬWhat do you want?вАЭ I asked. And one answered:

вАЬWe are waiting, Mr.¬†FredersenвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ

вАЬFor what?вАЭ I asked him.

вАЬWe are waiting,вАЭ continued the spokesman, вАЬfor someone to come, who will tell us what way we should goвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ

вАЬAnd you want to be this one, Joh?вАЭ

вАЬYes, mother.вАЭ

вАЬAnd will they trust in you?вАЭ

вАЬI do not know, mother. If we had been living a thousand years earlier, I should, perhaps, set out on the high road, with pilgrimвАЩs staff and cockle hat, and seek the way to the Holy Land of my belief, not returning home until I had cooled my feet, hot from wandering, in the Jordan, and, in the places of redemption, had prayed to the Redeemer. And, if I were not the man I am, it might come to pass that I should set out on a journey along the roads of those who walk in the shadow. I should, perhaps, sit with them in the corners of misery and learn to comprehend their groans and their curses into which a life of hell has transformed their prayersвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ For, from comprehension comes love, and I am longing to love mankind, motherвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ But I believe that acting is better than making pilgrimages, and that a good deed is worth more than the best of words. I believe, too, that I shall find the way to do so, for there are two standing by me, who wish to help meвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ

вАЬThree, JohвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ

The eyes of the son sought the gaze of the mother.

вАЬWho is the third?вАЭ

вАЬHelвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ

вАЬвА¶¬†HelвБ†вАФ?вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ

вАЬYes, child.вАЭ

Joh Fredersen remained silent.

She turned over the pages of her Bible, until she found what she sought. It was a letter. She took it and said, still holding it lovingly:

вАЬI received this letter from Hel before she died. She asked me to give it you, when, as she said, you had found your way home to me and to yourselfвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ

Soundlessly moving his; lips, Joh Fredersen stretched out his hand for the letter.

The yellowish envelope contained but a thin sheet of paper. Upon it stood, in the handwriting of a girlish woman:

вАЬI am going to God, and do not know when you will read these lines, Joh. But I know you will read them one day, and, until you come, I shall exhaust the eternal blissfulness in praying God to forgive me for making use of two Sayings from His Holy Book, in order to give you my heart, Joh.вАЭ

вАЬOne is: вАШI have loved thee with an everlasting love.вАЩ The other: вАШLo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world!вАЩвАКвАЭ

It took Joh Fredersen a long time before he succeeded in replacing the thin sheet of notepaper in the envelope. His eyes gazed through the open window by which his mother sat. He saw, drawing across the soft, blue sky, great, white clouds, which were like ships, laden with treasures from a far-off world.

вАЬOf what are you thinking, child?вАЭ asked his motherвАЩs voice, with care.

But Joh Fredersen gave her no answer. His heart, utterly redeemed, spoke stilly within him:

вАЬUnto the end of the worldвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Unto the end of the world.вАЭ