IV
They came out into the bright open where all the distances under the tall sky showed with distinct prismatic outlines. They made a little group of sevenвБ†вАФfor Tietjens would not have a caddyвБ†вАФwaiting on the flat, first teeing ground. Macmaster walked up to Tietjens and said under his voice:
вАЬYouвАЩve really sent that wire?вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
Tietjens said:
вАЬItвАЩll be in Germany by now!вАЭ
Mr. Sandbach hobbled from one to the other explaining the terms of his wager with Mr. Waterhouse. Mr. Waterhouse had backed one of the young men playing with him to drive into and hit twice in the eighteen holes the two city men who would be playing ahead of them. As the Minister had taken rather short odds Mr. Sandbach considered him a good sport.
A long way down the first hole Mr. Waterhouse and his two companions were approaching the first green. They had high sandhills to the right and, to their left, a road that was fringed with rushes and a narrow dyke. Ahead of the Cabinet Minister the two city men and their two caddies stood on the edge of the dyke or poked downwards into the rushes. Two girls appeared and disappeared on the tops of the sandhills. The policeman was strolling along the road, level with Mr. Waterhouse. The General said:
вАЬI think we could go now.вАЭ
Sandbach said:
вАЬWaterslops will get a hit at them from the next tee. TheyвАЩre in the dyke.вАЭ
The General drove a straight, goodish ball. Just as Macmaster was in his swing Sandbach shouted:
вАЬBy God! He nearly did it. See that fellow jump!вАЭ
Macmaster looked round over his shoulder and hissed with vexation between his teeth:
вАЬDonвАЩt you know that you donвАЩt shout while a man is driving? Or havenвАЩt you played golf?вАЭ He hurried fussily after his ball.
Sandbach said to Tietjens:
вАЬGolly! That chapвАЩs got a temper!вАЭ
Tietjens said:
вАЬOnly over this game. You deserved what you got.вАЭ
Sandbach said:
вАЬI did.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ But I didnвАЩt spoil his shot. HeвАЩs outdriven the General twenty yards.вАЭ
Tietjens said:
вАЬIt would have been sixty but for you.вАЭ
They loitered about on the tee waiting for the others to get their distance. Sandbach said:
вАЬBy Jove, your friend is on with his second.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ You wouldnвАЩt believe it of such a little beggar!вАЭ He added: вАЬHeвАЩs not much class, is he?вАЭ
Tietjens looked down his nose.
вАЬOh, about our class!вАЭ he said. вАЬHe wouldnвАЩt take a bet about driving into the couple ahead.вАЭ
Sandbach hated Tietjens for being a Tietjens of Groby: Tietjens was enraged by the existence of Sandbach, who was the son of an ennobled mayor of Middlebrough, seven miles or so from Groby. The feuds between the Cleveland landowners and the Cleveland plutocrats are very bitter. Sandbach said:
вАЬAh, I suppose he gets you out of scrapes with girls and the Treasury, and you take him about in return. ItвАЩs a practical combination.вАЭ
вАЬLike Pottle Mills and Stanton,вАЭ Tietjens said. The financial operations connected with the amalgamating of these two steelworks had earned SandbachвАЩs father a good deal of odium in the Cleveland district.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Sandbach said:
вАЬLook here, TietjensвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ But he changed his mind and said:
вАЬWeвАЩd better go now.вАЭ He drove off with an awkward action but not without skill. He certainly outplayed Tietjens.
Playing very slowly, for both were desultory and Sandbach very lame, they lost sight of the others behind some coastguard cottages and dunes before they had left the third tee. Because of his game leg Sandbach sliced a good deal. On this occasion he sliced right into the gardens of the cottages and went with his boy to look for his ball among potato-haulms, beyond a low wall. Tietjens patted his own ball lazily up the fairway and, dragging his bag behind him by the strap, he sauntered on.
Although Tietjens hated golf as he hated any occupation that was of a competitive nature he could engross himself in the mathematics of trajectories when he accompanied Macmaster in one of his expeditions for practice. He accompanied Macmaster because he liked there to be one pursuit at which his friend indisputably excelled himself, for it was a bore always browbeating the fellow. But he stipulated that they should visit three different and, if possible, unknown courses every weekend when they golfed. He interested himself then in the way the courses were laid out, acquiring thus an extraordinary connoisseurship in golf architecture, and he made abstruse calculations as to the flight of balls off sloped club-faces, as to the foot-poundals of energy exercised by one muscle or the other, and as to theories of spin. As often as not he palmed Macmaster off as a fair, average player on some other unfortunate fair, average stranger. Then he passed the afternoon in the clubhouse studying the pedigrees and forms of racehorses, for every clubhouse contained a copy of RuffвАЩs guide. In the spring he would hunt for and examine the nests of soft-billed birds, for he was interested in the domestic affairs of the cuckoo, though he hated natural history and field botany.
On this occasion he had just examined some notes of other mashie shots, had put the notebook back in his pocket, and had addressed his ball with a niblick that had an unusually roughened face and a head like a hatchet. Meticulously, when he had taken his grip he removed his little and third fingers from the leather of the shaft. He was thanking heaven that Sandbach seemed to be accounted for for ten minutes at least, for Sandbach was miserly over lost balls and, very slowly, he was raising his mashie to half cock for a sighting shot.
He was aware that someone, breathing a little heavily from small lungs, was standing close to him and watching him: he could indeed, beneath his cap-rim, perceive the tips of a pair of boyвАЩs white sand-shoes. It in no way perturbed him to be watched since he was avid of no personal glory when making his shots. A voice said:
вАЬI sayвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ He continued to look at his ball.
вАЬSorry to spoil your shot,вАЭ the voice said. вАЬButвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
Tietjens dropped his club altogether and straightened his back. A fair young woman with a fixed scowl was looking at him intently. She had a short skirt and was panting a little.
вАЬI say,вАЭ she said, вАЬgo and see they donвАЩt hurt Gertie. IвАЩve lost herвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ She pointed back to the sandhills. вАЬThere looked to be some beasts among them.вАЭ
She seemed a perfectly negligible girl except for the frown: her eyes blue, her hair no doubt fair under a white canvas hat. She had a striped cotton blouse, but her fawn tweed skirt was well hung.
Tietjens said:
вАЬYouвАЩve been demonstrating.вАЭ
She said:
вАЬOf course we have, and of course you object on principle. But you wonвАЩt let a girl be manhandled. DonвАЩt wait to tell me I know itвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
Noises existed. Sandbach, from beyond the low garden wall fifty yards away, was yelping, just like a dog: вАЬHi! Hi! Hi! Hi!вАЭ and gesticulating. His little caddy, entangled in his golf-bag, was trying to scramble over the wall. On top of a high sandhill stood the policeman: he waved his arms like a windmill and shouted. Beside him and behind, slowly rising, were the heads of the General, Macmaster and their two boys. Further along, in completion were appearing the figures of Mr.¬†Waterhouse, his two companions and their three boys. The Minister was waving his driver and shouting. They all shouted.
вАЬA regular rat-hunt,вАЭ the girl said; she was counting. вАЬEleven and two more caddies!вАЭ She exhibited satisfaction. вАЬI headed them all off except two beasts. They couldnвАЩt run. But neither can GertieвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
She said urgently:
вАЬCome along! You arenвАЩt going to leave Gertie to those beasts! TheyвАЩre drunkвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
Tietjens said:
вАЬCut away then. IвАЩll look after Gertie.вАЭ He picked up his bag.
вАЬNo, IвАЩll come with you,вАЭ the girl said.
Tietjens answered: вАЬOh, you donвАЩt want to go to gaol. Clear out!вАЭ
She said:
вАЬNonsense. IвАЩve put up with worse than that. Nine months as a slavey.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Come along!вАЭ
Tietjens started to runвБ†вАФrather like a rhinoceros seeing purple. He had been violently spurred, for he had been pierced by a shrill, faint scream. The girl ran beside him.
вАЬвА¶¬†canвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ run!вАЭ she panted, вАЬput on a spurt.вАЭ
Screams protesting against physical violence were at that date rare things in England. Tietjens had never heard the like. It upset him frightfully, though he was aware only of an expanse of open country. The policeman, whose buttons made him noteworthy, was descending his conical sandhill, diagonally, with caution. There is something grotesque about a town policeman, silvered helmet and all, in the open country. It was so clear and still in the air; Tietjens felt as if he were in a light museum looking at specimens.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶
A little young woman, engrossed, like a hunted rat, came round the corner of a green mound. вАЬThis is an assaulted female!вАЭ the mind of Tietjens said to him. She had a black skirt covered with sand, for she had just rolled down the sandhill; she had a striped grey and black silk blouse, one shoulder torn completely off, so that a white camisole showed. Over the shoulder of the sandhill came the two city men, flushed with triumph and panting; their red knitted waistcoats moved like bellows. The black-haired one, his eyes lurid and obscene, brandished aloft a fragment of black and grey stuff. He shouted hilariously:
вАЬStrip the bitch naked!вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ UghвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Strip the bitch stark naked!вАЭ and jumped down the little hill. He cannoned into Tietjens, who roared at the top of his voice:
вАЬYou infernal swine. IвАЩll knock your head off if you move!вАЭ
Behind TietjensвАЩ back the girl said:
вАЬCome along, Gertie.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ ItвАЩs only to thereвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
A voice panted in answer:
вАЬIвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ canвАЩt.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ My heartвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
Tietjens kept his eye upon the city man. His jaw had fallen down, his eyes stared! It was as if the bottom of his assured world, where all men desire in their hearts to bash women, had fallen out. He panted:
вАЬErgle! Ergle!вАЭ
Another scream, a little further than the last voices from behind his back, caused in Tietjens a feeling of intense weariness. What did beastly women want to scream for? He swung round, bag and all. The policeman, his face scarlet like a lobster just boiled, was lumbering unenthusiastically towards the two girls who were trotting towards the dyke. One of his hands, scarlet also, was extended. He was not a yard from Tietjens.
Tietjens was exhausted, beyond thinking or shouting. He slipped his clubs off his shoulder and, as if he were pitching his kit-bag into a luggage van, threw the whole lot between the policemanвАЩs running legs. The man, who had no impetus to speak of, pitched forward on to his hands and knees. His helmet over his eyes, he seemed to reflect for a moment; then he removed his helmet and with great deliberation rolled round and sat on the turf. His face was completely without emotion, long, sandy-moustached and rather shrewd. He mopped his brow with a carmine handkerchief that had white spots.
Tietjens walked up to him.
вАЬClumsy of me!вАЭ he said. вАЬI hope youвАЩre not hurt.вАЭ He drew from his breast pocket a curved silver flask. The policeman said nothing. His world, too, contained uncertainties and he was profoundly glad to be able to sit still without discredit. He muttered:
вАЬShaken. A bit! Anybody would be!вАЭ
That let him out and he fell to examining with attention the bayonet catch of the flask top. Tietjens opened it for him. The two girls, advancing at a fatigued trot, were near the dyke side. The fair girl, as they trotted, was trying to adjust her companionвАЩs hat; attached by pins to the back of her hair it flapped on her shoulder.
All the rest of the posse were advancing at a very slow walk, in a converging semicircle. Two little caddies were running, but Tietjens saw them check, hesitate and stop. And there floated to TietjensвАЩ ears the words:
вАЬStop, you little devils. SheвАЩll knock your heads off.вАЭ
Rt. Hon.¬†Mr.¬†Waterhouse must have found an admirable voice trainer somewhere. The drab girl was balancing tremulously over a plank on the dyke; the other took it at a jump: up in the airвБ†вАФdown on her feet; perfectly businesslike. And, as soon as the other girl was off the plank, she was down on her knees before it, pulling it towards her, the other girl trotting away over the vast marsh field.
The girl dropped the plank on the grass. Then she looked up and faced the men and boys who stood in a row on the road. She called in a shrill, high voice, like a young cockerelвАЩs:
вАЬSeventeen to two! The usual male odds! YouвАЩll have to go round by Camber railway bridge, and weвАЩll be in Folkestone by then. WeвАЩve got bicycles!вАЭ She was half going when she checked and, searching out Tietjens to address, exclaimed: вАЬIвАЩm sorry I said that. Because some of you didnвАЩt want to catch us. But some of you did. And you were seventeen to two.вАЭ She addressed Mr.¬†Waterhouse:
вАЬWhy donвАЩt you give women the vote?вАЭ she said. вАЬYouвАЩll find it will interfere a good deal with your indispensable golf if you donвАЩt. Then what becomes of the nationвАЩs health?вАЭ
Mr. Waterhouse said:
вАЬIf youвАЩll come and discuss it quietlyвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
She said:
вАЬOh, tell that to the marines,вАЭ and turned away, the men in a row watching her figure disappear into the distance of the flat land. Not one of them was inclined to risk that jump: there was nine foot of mud in the bottom of the dyke. It was quite true that, the plank being removed, to go after the women they would have had to go several miles round. It had been a well thought out raid. Mr.¬†Waterhouse said that girl was a ripping girl: the others found her just ordinary. Mr.¬†Sandbach, who had only lately ceased to shout: вАЬHi!вАЭ wanted to know what they were going to do about catching the women, but Mr.¬†Waterhouse said: вАЬOh, chuck it, Sandy,вАЭ and went off.
Mr.¬†Sandbach refused to continue his match with Tietjens. He said that Tietjens was the sort of fellow who was the ruin of England. He said he had a good mind to issue a warrant for the arrest of TietjensвБ†вАФfor obstructing the course of justice. Tietjens pointed out that Sandbach wasnвАЩt a borough magistrate and so couldnвАЩt. And Sandbach went off, dot and carry one, and began a furious row with the two city men who had retreated to a distance. He said they were the sort of men who were the ruin of England. They bleated like rams.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶
Tietjens wandered slowly up the course, found his ball, made his shot with care and found that the ball deviated several feet less to the right of a straight line than he had expected. He tried the shot again, obtained the same result and tabulated his observations in his notebook. He sauntered slowly back towards the clubhouse. He was content.
He felt himself to be content for the first time in four months. His pulse beat calmly; the heat of the sun all over him appeared to be a beneficent flood. On the flanks of the older and larger sandhills he observed the minute herbage, mixed with little purple aromatic plants. To these the constant nibbling of sheep had imparted a protective tininess. He wandered, content, round the sandhills to the small, silted harbour mouth. After reflecting for some time on the wave-curves in the sloping mud of the water sides he had a long conversation, mostly in signs, with a Finn who hung over the side of a tarred, stump-masted, battered vessel that had a gaping, splintered hole where the anchor should have hung. She came from Archangel; was of several hundred tons burden, was knocked together anyhow, of soft wood, for about ninety pounds, and launched, sink or swim, in the timber trade. Beside her, taut, glistening with brasswork, was a new fishing boat, just built there for the Lowestoft fleet. Ascertaining her price from a man who was finishing her painting, Tietjens reckoned that you could have built three of the Archangel timber ships for the cost of that boat, and that the Archangel vessel would earn about twice as much per hour per ton.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶
It was in that way his mind worked when he was fit: it picked up little pieces of definite, workmanlike information. When it had enough it classified them: not for any purpose, but because to know things was agreeable and gave a feeling of strength, of having in reserve something that the other fellow would not suspect.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ He passed a long, quiet, abstracted afternoon.
In the dressing-room he found the General, among lockers, old coats, and stoneware washing basins set in scrubbed wood. The General leaned back against a row of these things.
вАЬYou are the ruddy limit!вАЭ he exclaimed.
Tietjens said:
вАЬWhereвАЩs Macmaster?вАЭ
The General said he had sent Macmaster off with Sandbach in the two-seater. Macmaster had to dress before going up to Mountby. He added: вАЬThe ruddy limit!вАЭ again.
вАЬBecause I knocked the bobbie over?вАЭ Tietjens asked. вАЬHe liked it.вАЭ
The General said:
вАЬKnocked the bobbie over.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ I didnвАЩt see that.вАЭ
вАЬHe didnвАЩt want to catch the girls,вАЭ Tietjens said, вАЬyou could see himвБ†вАФoh, yearning not to.вАЭ
вАЬI donвАЩt want to know anything about that,вАЭ the General said. вАЬI shall hear enough about it from Paul Sandbach. Give the bobbie a quid and letвАЩs hear no more of it. IвАЩm a magistrate.вАЭ
вАЬThen what have I done?вАЭ Tietjens said. вАЬI helped those girls to get off. You didnвАЩt want to catch them; Waterhouse didnвАЩt, the policeman didnвАЩt. No one did except the swine. Then whatвАЩs the matter?вАЭ
вАЬDamn it all!вАЭ the General said, вАЬdonвАЩt you remember that youвАЩre a young married man?вАЭ
With respect for the GeneralвАЩs superior age and achievements, Tietjens stopped himself laughing.
вАЬIf youвАЩre really serious, sir,вАЭ he said, вАЬI always remember it very carefully. I donвАЩt suppose youвАЩre suggesting that IвАЩve ever shown want of respect for Sylvia.вАЭ
The General shook his head.
вАЬI donвАЩt know,вАЭ he said. вАЬAnd damn it all IвАЩm worried. IвАЩm.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Hang it all, IвАЩm your fatherвАЩs oldest friend.вАЭ The General looked indeed worn and saddened in the light of the sand-drifted, ground-glass windows. He said: вАЬWas that skirt aвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ a friend of yours? Had you arranged it with her?вАЭ
Tietjens said:
вАЬWouldnвАЩt it be better, sir, if you said what you had on your mind?вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
The old General blushed a little.
вАЬI donвАЩt like to,вАЭ he said straightforwardly. вАЬYou brilliant fellow.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ I only want, my dear boy, to hint thatвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
Tietjens said, a little more stiffly:
вАЬIвАЩd prefer you to get it out, sir.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ I acknowledge your right as my fatherвАЩs oldest friend.вАЭ
вАЬThen,вАЭ the General burst out, вАЬwho was the skirt you were lolloping up Pall Mall with? On the last day they trooped the colour?вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ I didnвАЩt see her myself.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Was it this same one? Paul said she looked like a cook maid.вАЭ
Tietjens made himself a little more rigid.
вАЬShe was, as a matter of fact, a bookmakerвАЩs secretary,вАЭ Tietjens said. вАЬI imagine I have the right to walk where I like, with whom I like. And no one has the right to question it.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ I donвАЩt mean you, sir. But no one else.вАЭ
The General said puzzledly:
вАЬItвАЩs you brilliant fellows.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ They all say youвАЩre brilliant.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
Tietjens said:
вАЬYou might let your rooted distrust of intelligence.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ ItвАЩs natural of course; but you might let it allow you to be just to me. I assure you there was nothing discreditable.вАЭ
The General interrupted:
вАЬIf you were a stupid young subaltern and told me you were showing your motherвАЩs new cook the way to the Piccadilly tube IвАЩd believe you.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ But, then, no young subaltern would do such a damn, blasted, tomfool thing! Paul said you walked beside her like the king in his glory! Through the crush outside the Haymarket, of all places in the world!вАЭ
вАЬIвАЩm obliged to Sandbach for his commendation.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ Tietjens said. He thought a moment. Then he said:
вАЬI was trying to get that young woman.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ I was taking her out to lunch from her office at the bottom of the Haymarket.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ To get her off a friendвАЩs back. That is, of course, between ourselves.вАЭ
He said this with great reluctance because he didnвАЩt want to cast reflection on MacmasterвАЩs taste, for the young lady had been by no means one to be seen walking with a really circumspect public official. But he had said nothing to indicate Macmaster, and he had other friends.
The General choked.
вАЬUpon my soul,вАЭ he said, вАЬwhat do you take me for?вАЭ He repeated the words as if he were amazed. вАЬIf,вАЭ he said, вАЬmy G.S.O. IIвБ†вАФwhoвАЩs the stupidest ass I knowвБ†вАФtold me such a damn-fool lie as that IвАЩd have him broke tomorrow.вАЭ He went on expostulatorily: вАЬDamn it all, itвАЩs the first duty of a soldierвБ†вАФitвАЩs the first duty of all EnglishmenвБ†вАФto be able to tell a good lie in answer to a charge. But a lie like thatвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
He broke off breathless, then he began again:
вАЬHang it all, I told that lie to my grandmother and my grandfather told it to his grandfather. And they call you brilliant!вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ He paused and then asked reproachfully: вАЬOr do you think IвАЩm in a state of senile decay?вАЭ
Tietjens said:
вАЬI know you, sir, to be the smartest general of division in the British Army. I leave you to draw your own conclusions as to why I said what I did.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ He had told the exact truth, but he was not sorry to be disbelieved.
The General said:
вАЬThen IвАЩll take it that you tell me a lie meaning me to know that itвАЩs a lie. ThatвАЩs quite proper. I take it you mean to keep the woman officially out of it. But look here, ChrissieвАЭвБ†вАФhis tone took a deeper seriousnessвБ†вАФвАЬIf the woman thatвАЩs come between you and SylviaвБ†вАФthatвАЩs broken up your home, damn it, for thatвАЩs what it is!вБ†вАФis little Miss WannopвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
вАЬHer name was Julia Mandelstein,вАЭ Tietjens said.
The General said:
вАЬYes! Yes! Of course!вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ But if it is the little Wannop girl and itвАЩs not gone too far.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Put her back.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Put her back, as you used to be a good boy! It would be too hard on the motherвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
Tietjens said:
вАЬGeneral! I give you my wordвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
The General said:
вАЬIвАЩm not asking any questions, my boy; IвАЩm talking now. YouвАЩve told me the story you want told and itвАЩs the story IвАЩll tell for you! But that little piece isвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ she used to be!вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ as straight as a die. I daresay you know better than I. Of course when they get among the wild women thereвАЩs no knowing what happens to them. They say theyвАЩre all whores.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ I beg your pardon, if you like the girlвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
вАЬIs Miss Wannop,вАЭ Tietjens asked, вАЬthe girl who demonstrates?вАЭ
вАЬSandbach said,вАЭ the General went on, вАЬthat he couldnвАЩt see from where he was whether that girl was the same as the one in the Haymarket. But he thought it was.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ He was pretty certain.вАЭ
вАЬAs heвАЩs married your sister,вАЭ Tietjens said, вАЬone canвАЩt impugn his taste in women.вАЭ
вАЬI say again, IвАЩm not asking,вАЭ the General said. вАЬBut I do say again too: put her back. Her father was a great friend of your fatherвАЩs: or your father was a great admirer of his. They say he was the most brilliant brain of the party.вАЭ
вАЬOf course I know who Professor Wannop was,вАЭ Tietjens said. вАЬThereвАЩs nothing you could tell me about him.вАЭ
вАЬI daresay not,вАЭ the General said drily. вАЬThen you know that he didnвАЩt leave a farthing when he died and the rotten Liberal Government wouldnвАЩt put his wife and children on the Civil List because heвАЩd sometimes written for a Tory paper. And you know that the mother has had a deuced hard row to hoe and has only just turned the corner. If she can be said to have turned it. I know Claudine takes them all the peaches she can cadge out of PaulвАЩs gardener.вАЭ
Tietjens was about to say that Mrs.¬†Wannop, the mother, had written the only novel worth reading since the eighteenth century.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ But the General went on:
вАЬListen to me, my boy.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ If you canвАЩt get on without womenвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ I should have thought Sylvia was good enough. But I know what we men are.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ I donвАЩt set up to be a saint. I heard a woman in the promenade of the Empire say once that it was the likes of them that saved the lives and figures of all the virtuous women of the country. And I daresay itвАЩs true.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ But choose a girl that you can set up in a tobacco shop and do your courting in the back parlour. Not in the Haymarket.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Heaven knows if you can afford it. ThatвАЩs your affair. You appear to have been sold up. And from what SylviaвАЩs let drop to ClaudineвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
вАЬI donвАЩt believe,вАЭ Tietjens said, вАЬthat SylviaвАЩs said anything to Lady ClaudineвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ SheвАЩs too straight.вАЭ
вАЬI didnвАЩt say вАШsaid,вАЩвАКвАЭ the General exclaimed, вАЬI particularly said вАШlet drop.вАЩ And perhaps I oughtnвАЩt to have said as much as that, but you know what devils for ferreting out women are. And ClaudineвАЩs worse than any woman I ever knewвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
вАЬAnd, of course, sheвАЩs had Sandbach to help,вАЭ Tietjens said.
вАЬOh, that fellowвАЩs worse than any woman,вАЭ the General exclaimed.
вАЬThen what does the whole indictment amount to?вАЭ Tietjens asked.
вАЬOh, hang it,вАЭ the General brought out, вАЬIвАЩm not a beastly detective, I only want a plausible story to tell Claudine. Or not even plausible. An obvious lie as long as it shows youвАЩre not flying in the face of societyвБ†вАФas walking up the Haymarket with the little Wannop when your wifeвАЩs left you because of her would be.вАЭ
вАЬWhat does it amount to?вАЭ Tietjens said patiently. вАЬWhat Sylvia вАШlet dropвАЩ?вАЭ
вАЬOnly,вАЭ the General answered, вАЬthat you areвБ†вАФthat your views areвБ†вАФimmoral. Of course they often puzzle me. And, of course, if you have views that arenвАЩt the same as other peopleвАЩs, and donвАЩt keep them to yourself, other people will suspect you of immorality. ThatвАЩs what put Paul Sandbach on your track!вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ and that youвАЩre extravagant.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Oh, hang it.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Eternal hansoms, and taxis and telegramsвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ You know, my boy, times arenвАЩt what they were when your father and I married. We used to say you could do it on five hundred a year as a younger son.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ And then this girl tooвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ His voice took on a more agitated note of shynessвБ†вАФpain.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ вАЬIt probably hadnвАЩt occurred to you.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ But, of course, Sylvia has an income of her own.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ And, donвАЩt you seeвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ if you outrun the constable andвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ In short, youвАЩre spending SylviaвАЩs money on the other girl, and thatвАЩs what people canвАЩt stand.вАЭ He added quickly: вАЬIвАЩm bound to say that Mrs.¬†Satterthwaite backs you through thick and thin. Thick and thin! Claudine wrote to her. But you know what women are with a handsome son-in-law thatвАЩs always polite to them. But I may tell you that but for your mother-in-law, Claudine would have cut you out of her visiting list months ago. And youвАЩd have been cut out of some others tooвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
Tietjens said:
вАЬThanks. I think thatвАЩs enough to go on with.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Give me a couple of minutes to reflect on what youвАЩve saidвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
вАЬIвАЩll wash my hands and change my coat,вАЭ the General said with intense relief.
At the end of two minutes Tietjens said:
вАЬNo; I donвАЩt see that there is anything I want to say.вАЭ The General exclaimed with enthusiasm:
вАЬThatвАЩs my good lad! Open confession is next to reform.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ AndвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ and try to be more respectful to your superiors.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Damn it; they say youвАЩre brilliant. But I thank heaven I havenвАЩt got you in my command.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Though I believe youвАЩre a good lad. But youвАЩre the sort of fellow to set a whole division by the ears.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ A regularвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ whatвАЩs вАЩis name? A regular Dreyfus!вАЭ
вАЬDid you think Dreyfus was guilty?вАЭ Tietjens asked.
вАЬHang it,вАЭ the General said, вАЬhe was worse than guiltyвБ†вАФthe sort of fellow you couldnвАЩt believe in and yet couldnвАЩt prove anything against. The curse of the worldвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
Tietjens said:
вАЬAh.вАЭ
вАЬWell, they are,вАЭ the General said: вАЬfellows like that unsettle society. You donвАЩt know where you are. You canвАЩt judge. They make you uncomfortable.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ A brilliant fellow too! I believe heвАЩs a brigadier-general by nowвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ He put his arm round TietjensвАЩ shoulders.
вАЬThere, there, my dear boy,вАЭ he said, вАЬcome and have a sloe gin. ThatвАЩs the real answer to all beastly problems.вАЭ
It was some time before Tietjens could get to think of his own problems. The fly that took them back went with the slow pomp of the procession over the winding marsh road in front of the absurdly picturesque red pyramid of the very old town. Tietjens had to listen to the General suggesting that it would be better if he didnвАЩt come to the golf-club till Monday. He would get Macmaster some good games. A good, sound fellow that Macmaster now. It was a pity Tietjens hadnвАЩt some of his soundness!
Two city men had approached the General on the course and had used some violent invectives against Tietjens: they had objected to being called ruddy swine to their faces: they were going to the police. The General said that he had told them himself, slowly and guiltily, that they were ruddy swine and that they would never get another ticket at that club after Monday. But till Monday, apparently, they had the right to be there and the club wouldnвАЩt want scenes. Sandbach, too, was infuriated about Tietjens.
Tietjens said that the fault lay with the times that permitted the introduction into gentlemenвАЩs company of such social swipes as Sandbach. One acted perfectly correctly and then a dirty little beggar like that put dirty little constructions on it and ran about and bleated. He added that he knew Sandbach was the GeneralвАЩs brother-in-law, but he couldnвАЩt help it. That was the truth.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ The General said: вАЬI know, my boy: I knowвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ But one had to take society as one found it. Claudine had to be provided for and Sandbach made a very good husband, careful, sober, and on the right side in politics. A bit of a rip; but they couldnвАЩt ask for everything! And Claudine was using all the influence she had with the other sideвБ†вАФwhich was not a little, women were so wonderful!вБ†вАФto get him a diplomatic job in Turkey, so as to get him out of the way of Mrs.¬†Crundall! Mrs.¬†Crundall was the leading Anti-Suffragette of the little town. That was what made Sandbach so bitter against Tietjens. He told Tietjens so that Tietjens might understand.
Tietjens had hitherto flattered himself that he could examine a subject swiftly and put it away in his mind. To the General he hardly listened. The allegations against himself were beastly; but he could usually ignore allegations against himself and he imagined that if he said no more about them he would himself hear no more. And, if there were, in clubs and places where men talk, unpleasant rumours as to himself he preferred it to be thought that he was the rip, not his wife the strumpet. That was normal, male vanity: the preference of the English gentleman! Had it been a matter of Sylvia spotless and himself as spotless as he wasвБ†вАФfor in all these things he knew himself to be spotless!вБ†вАФhe would certainly have defended himself, at least, to the General. But he had acted practically in not defending himself more vigorously. For he imagined that, had he really tried, he could have made the General believe him. But he had behaved rightly! It was not mere vanity. There was the child up at his sister EffieвАЩs. It was better for a boy to have a rip of a father than a whore for mother!
The General was expatiating on the solidity of a squat castle, like a pile of draughts, away to the left, in the sun, on the flatness. He was saying that we didnвАЩt build like that nowadays.
Tietjens said:
вАЬYouвАЩre perfectly wrong, General. All the castles that Henry VIII built in 1543 along this coast are mere monuments of jerry-building.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ вАШIn 1543 jactat castra Delis, Sandgatto, Reia, Hastingas Henricus RexвАЩвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ That means he chucked them downвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
The General laughed:
вАЬYou are an incorrigible fellow.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ If ever thereвАЩs any known, certain factвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
вАЬBut go and look at the beastly things,вАЭ Tietjens said. вАЬYouвАЩll see theyвАЩve got just a facing of Caen stone that the tide floated here, and the fillings-up are just rubble, any rubbish.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Look here! ItвАЩs a known certain fact, isnвАЩt it, that your eighteen-pounders are better than the French seventy-fives. They tell us so in the House, on the hustings, in the papers: the public believes it.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ But would you put one of your tiny pet things firingвБ†вАФwhat is it?вБ†вАФfour shells a minute?вБ†вАФwith the little bent pins in their tails to stop the recoilвБ†вАФagainst their seventy-fives with the compressed-air cylindersвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
The General sat stiffly upon his cushions:
вАЬThatвАЩs different,вАЭ he said. вАЬHow the devil do you get to know these things?вАЭ
вАЬIt isnвАЩt different,вАЭ Tietjens said, вАЬitвАЩs the same muddleheaded frame of mind that sees good building in Henry VIII as lets us into wars with hopelessly antiquated field guns and rottenly inferior ammunition. YouвАЩd fire any fellow on your staff who said we could stand up for a minute against the French.вАЭ
вАЬWell, anyhow,вАЭ the General said, вАЬI thank heaven youвАЩre not on my staff for youвАЩd talk my hind leg off in a week. ItвАЩs perfectly true that the publicвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
But Tietjens was not listening. He was considering that it was natural for an unborn fellow like Sandbach to betray the solidarity that should exist between men. And it was natural for a childless woman like Lady Claudine Sandbach with a notoriously, a flagrantly unfaithful husband to believe in the unfaithfulness of the husbands of other women!
The General was saying:
вАЬWho did you hear that stuff from about the French field gun?вАЭ
Tietjens said:
вАЬFrom you. Three weeks ago!вАЭ
And all the other society women with unfaithful husbands.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ They must do their best to down and out a man. They would cut him on their visiting lists! Let them. The barren harlots mated to faithless eunuchs;вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Suddenly he thought that he didnвАЩt know for certain that he was the father of his child and he groaned.
вАЬWell, what have I said wrong now?вАЭ the General asked. вАЬSurely you donвАЩt maintain that pheasants do eat mangolds.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ
Tietjens proved his reputation for sanity with:
вАЬNo! I was just groaning at the thought of the Chancellor! ThatвАЩs sound enough for you, isnвАЩt it?вАЭ But it gave him a nasty turn. He hadnвАЩt been able to pigeonhole and padlock his disagreeable reflections. He had been as good as talking to himself.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶
In the bow-window of another hostelry than his own he caught the eye of Mr.¬†Waterhouse, who was looking at the view over the marshes. The great man beckoned to him and he went in. Mr.¬†Waterhouse was aware that TietjensвБ†вАФwhom he assumed to be a man of senseвБ†вАФshould get any pursuit of the two girls stopped off. He couldnвАЩt move in the matter himself, but a five pound note and possibly a police promotion or so might be handed round if no advertisement were given to the mad women on account of their raid of that afternoon.
It was not a very difficult matter: for where the great man was to be found in the club lounge, there, in the bar, the mayor, the town clerk, the local head of the police, the doctors and solicitors would be found drinking together. And after it was arranged the great man himself came into the bar, had a drink and pleased them all immensely by his affability.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶
Tietjens himself, dining alone with the Minister to whom he wanted to talk about his Labour Finance Act, didnвАЩt find him a disagreeable fellow: not really foolish, not sly except in his humour, tired obviously, but livening up after a couple of whiskies, and certainly not as yet plutocratic; with tastes for apple-pie and cream of a fourteen-year-old boy. And, even as regards his famous Act, which was then shaking the country to its political foundations, once you accepted its fundamental unsuitedness to the temperament and needs of the English working-class, you could see that Mr.¬†Waterhouse didnвАЩt want to be dishonest. He accepted with gratitude several of TietjensвАЩ emendations in the actuarial schedules.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ And over their port they agreed on two fundamental legislative ideals: every working man to have a minimum of four hundred a year and every beastly manufacturer who wanted to pay less to be hung. That, it appeared, was the High Toryism of Tietjens as it was the extreme Radicalism of the extreme Left of the Left.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶
And Tietjens, who hated no man, in face of this simple-minded and agreeable schoolboy type of fellow, fell to wondering why it was that humanity that was next to always agreeable in its units was, as a mass, a phenomenon so hideous. You look at a dozen men, each of them not by any means detestable and not uninteresting: for each of them would have technical details of their affairs to impart: you formed them into a Government or a club and at once, with oppressions, inaccuracies, gossip, backbiting, lying, corruptions and vileness, you had the combination of wolf, tiger, weasel and louse-covered ape that was human society. And he remembered the words of some Russian: вАЬCats and monkeys. Monkeys and cats. All humanity is there.вАЭ
Tietjens and Mrs. Waterhouse spent the rest of the evening together.
Whilst Tietjens was interviewing the policeman, the Minister sat on the front steps of the cottage and smoked cheap cigarettes, and when Tietjens went to bed Mr.¬†Waterhouse insisted on sending by him kindly messages to Miss Wannop, asking her to come and discuss female suffrage any afternoon she liked in his private room at the House of Commons. Mr.¬†Waterhouse flatly refused to believe that Tietjens hadnвАЩt arranged the raid for Miss Wannop. He said it had been too neatly planned for any woman, and he said Tietjens was a lucky fellow, for she was a ripping girl.
Back in his room under the rafters, Tietjens fell, nevertheless, at once a prey to real agitation. For a long time he pounded from wall to wall and, since he could not shake off the train of thought, he got out at last his patience cards, and devoted himself seriously to thinking out the conditions of his life with Sylvia. He wanted to stop scandal if he could; he wanted them to live within his income, he wanted to subtract that child from the influence of its mother. These were all definite but difficult things.вБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Then one-half of his mind lost itself in the rearrangement of schedules, and on his brilliant table his hands set queens on kings and checked their recurrences.
In that way the sudden entrance of Macmaster gave him a really terrible physical shock. He nearly vomited: his brain reeled and the room fell about. He drank a great quantity of whisky in front of MacmasterвАЩs goggling eyes; but even at that he couldnвАЩt talk, and he dropped into his bed faintly aware of his friendвАЩs efforts to loosen his clothes. He had, he knew, carried the suppression of thought in his conscious mind so far that his unconscious self had taken command and had, for the time, paralysed both his body and mind.