XXVII + 

A Coral Island in the Pacific + 

вАЬWell, IвАЩll go to blazes,вАЭ said Captain Trouble, вАЬif that lanky fellow over there isnвАЩt their leader!вАЭ + 

вАЬThatвАЩs Jimmy,вАЭ remarked G. H. Bondy. вАЬHe used to work here at one time. I thought he was quite tame by now.вАЭ + 

вАЬThe devil must have owed me something,вАЭ the Captain growled, вАЬor I shouldnвАЩt have had to land here on this wretchedвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ Hereheretua!!! Eh?вАЭ + 

вАЬListen,вАЭ said G. H. Bondy, laying his gun on the table on the veranda. вАЬIs it the same as this in other places?вАЭ + 

вАЬI should say so,вАЭ boomed Captain Trouble. вАЬNot far off, on Rawaiwai, Captain Barker and his whole crew were eaten. And on Mangai they had a banquet on three millionaires like yourself.вАЭ + 

вАЬSutherland Bros.?вАЭ asked Bondy. + 

вАЬI think so. And on Starbuck Island they roasted a High Commissioner. It was that fat MacDeon; you know him, donвАЩt you?вАЭ + 

вАЬNo.вАЭ + 

вАЬYou donвАЩt know him?вАЭ shouted the Captain. вАЬHow long have you been here, man?вАЭ + 

вАЬThis is my ninth year,вАЭ said Mr.¬†Bondy. + 

вАЬThen you might well have known him,вАЭ the Captain said. вАЬSo youвАЩve been here nine years? Business, eh? Or a little home of refuge, is it? On account of your nerves, I suppose?вАЭ + 

вАЬNo,вАЭ said Mr.¬†Bondy. вАЬYou see, I foresaw that they were all going to be at loggerheads over there, so I got out of the way. I thought that here I would find more peace.вАЭ + 

вАЬAha, peace! You donвАЩt know our big black fellows! ThereвАЩs a bit of a war going on here all the time, my lad.вАЭ + 

вАЬOh well,вАЭ G. H. Bondy demurred, вАЬthere really was peace here. TheyвАЩre quite decent chaps, these Papuans or whatever you call them. ItвАЩs only just recently that theyвАЩve begun to beвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ rather disagreeable. I donвАЩt quite understand them. What are they really after?вАЭ + 

вАЬNothing special,вАЭ said the Captain. вАЬThey only want to eat us.вАЭ + 

вАЬAre they as hungry as all that?вАЭ asked Bondy in amazement. + 

вАЬI donвАЩt know. I think they do it more out of religion. ItвАЩs one of their religious rites, donвАЩt you see? Something like communion, I take it. It takes them that way every now and then.вАЭ + 

вАЬIndeed,вАЭ said Mr.¬†Bondy thoughtfully. + 

вАЬEveryone has his hobby,вАЭ growled the Captain. вАЬThe local hobby here is to eat up the stranger and dry his head in smoke.вАЭ + 

вАЬWhat, smoke it as well?вАЭ Mr.¬†Bondy exclaimed with horror. + 

вАЬOh, thatвАЩs not done till after youвАЩre dead,вАЭ said the Captain consolingly. вАЬThey cherish the smoked head as a souvenir. Have you ever seen those dried heads theyвАЩve got in the Ethnographical Museum at Auckland?вАЭ + 

вАЬNo,вАЭ said Bondy. вАЬI donвАЩt thinkвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ thatвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ that IвАЩd look very attractive if I were smoked.вАЭ + 

вАЬYouвАЩre a bit too fat for it,вАЭ observed the Captain, inspecting him critically. вАЬIt doesnвАЩt make so very much difference to a thin man.вАЭ + 

Bondy still looked anything but tranquil. He sat droopingly on the veranda of his bungalow on the coral island of Hereheretua, which he had purchased just before the outbreak of the Greatest War. Captain Trouble was glowering suspiciously at the thicket of mangroves and bananas which surrounded the bungalow. + 

вАЬHow many natives are there on the island?вАЭ he asked suddenly. + 

вАЬAbout a hundred and twenty,вАЭ said G. H. Bondy. + 

вАЬAnd how many of us are there in the bungalow?вАЭ + 

вАЬSeven, counting the Chinese cook.вАЭ + 

The Captain sighed and looked out to sea. His ship, the Papeete, lay there at anchor; but to get to her he would have to go along a narrow path between the mangroves, and this did not precisely seem advisable. + 

вАЬLook here, sir,вАЭ he said after a while, вАЬwhat are they squabbling about over there, anyway? Some boundary or other?вАЭ + 

вАЬLess than that.вАЭ + 

вАЬColonies?вАЭ + 

вАЬEven less than that.вАЭ + 

вАЬCommercial treaties?вАЭ + 

вАЬNo. Only about the truth.вАЭ + 

вАЬWhat kind of truth?вАЭ + 

вАЬThe absolute truth. You see, every nation insists that it has the absolute truth.вАЭ + 

вАЬHm,вАЭ grunted the Captain. вАЬWhat is it, anyway?вАЭ + 

вАЬNothing. A sort of human passion. YouвАЩve heard, havenвАЩt you, that in Europe yonder, and everywhere in fact, aвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ a God, you knowвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ came into the world.вАЭ + 

вАЬYes, I did hear that.вАЭ + 

вАЬWell, thatвАЩs what itвАЩs all about, donвАЩt you understand?вАЭ + 

вАЬNo, I donвАЩt understand, old man. If you ask me, the true God would put things right in the world. The one theyвАЩve got canвАЩt be the true and proper God.вАЭ + 

вАЬOn the contrary,вАЭ said G. H. Bondy (obviously pleased at being able to talk for once with an independent and experienced human being), вАЬI assure you that it is the true God. But IвАЩll tell you something else. This true God is far too big.вАЭ + 

вАЬDo you think so?вАЭ + 

вАЬI do indeed. He is infinite. ThatвАЩs just where the trouble lies. You see, everyone measures off a certain amount of Him and then thinks it is the entire God. Each one appropriates a little fringe or fragment of Him and then thinks he possesses the whole of Him. See?вАЭ + 

вАЬAha,вАЭ said the Captain. вАЬAnd then gets angry with everyone else who has a different bit of Him.вАЭ + 

вАЬExactly. In order to convince himself that God is wholly his, he has to go and kill all the others. Just for that very reason, because it means so much to him to have the whole of God and the whole of the truth. ThatвАЩs why he canвАЩt bear anyone else to have any other God or any other truth. If he once allowed that, he would have to admit that he himself has only a few wretched metres or gallons or sackloads of divine truth. You see, suppose Dash were convinced that it was tremendously important that only DashвАЩs underwear should be the best on earth, he would have to burn his rival, Blank, and all BlankвАЩs underwear. But Dash isnвАЩt so silly as that in the matter of underwear; he is only as silly as that in the matter of religion or English politics. If he believed that God was something as substantial and essential as underwear, he would allow other people to provide themselves with Him just as they pleased. But he hasnвАЩt sufficient commercial confidence in Him; and so he forces DashвАЩs God or DashвАЩs Truth on everybody with curses, wars, and other unreliable forms of advertisement. I am a business man and I understand competition, but this sort ofвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ + 

вАЬWait a minute,вАЭ interrupted Captain Trouble, and aimed a shot into the mangrove thicket. вАЬThere, I think thatвАЩs one less of them.вАЭ + 

вАЬHe died for his faith,вАЭ whispered Bondy dreamily. вАЬYou have forcibly restrained him from devouring me. He fell for the national ideal of cannibalism. In Europe people have been devouring each other from time immemorial out of idealism. You are a decent man, Captain, but itвАЩs quite possible that youвАЩd devour me on behalf of any fundamental principle of navigation. IвАЩve lost confidence even in you.вАЭ + 

вАЬYouвАЩre quite right,вАЭ the Captain grumbled. вАЬWhen I look at you, I feel that IвАЩmвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ + 

вАЬвА¶¬†a violent anti-Semite. I know. That doesnвАЩt matter, I had myself baptized. But do you know, Captain, whatвАЩs got hold of those black idiots? The night before last they fished out of the sea a Japanese atomic torpedo. TheyвАЩve set it up over there under the coconut palms, and now they are bowing down before it. Now they have a God of their own. ThatвАЩs why they must devour us.вАЭ + 

War-cries sounded from the mangrove thicket. + 

вАЬDo you hear them?вАЭ muttered the Captain. вАЬOn my soul, IвАЩd ratherвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶ go through the geometry examination all over againвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ + 

вАЬListen,вАЭ Bondy whispered. вАЬCouldnвАЩt we go over to their religion? As far as IвАЩm concernedвБ†вАКвБ†вА¶вАЭ + 

At that moment a gun boomed out from the Papeete. + 

The Captain uttered a low cry of joy. + 