XXI
How Simplicissimus Further Fared in Moscow
From this time I was watched, not openly indeed, but secretly, by certain soldiers of the Strelitz guard, and that without my knowledge; and my colonel and his family never once came in my sight, so that I knew not what was become of him: and all this, as may easily be thought, brought in my head strange conceits and many grey hairs also. There I made the acquaintance of the Germans that dwell in Moscow, some as traders, some as mechanics, and to them lamented my plight and how I had been deceived by guile; who gave me comfort and direction how I, with a fair opportunity, might return to Germany. But so soon as they got wind of it that the Czar had determined to keep me in the land and would force me to it, they all became dumb towards me, yea, avoided my company, and ’twas hard for me even to find a shelter for my head. For I had already devoured my horse, saddle and trappings and all, and was now doling out one today and tomorrow another of the ducats which I had wisely sewn into my clothes. At last I began to turn into money my rings and trinkets, in the hope to keep myself so until I could find a fair occasion to get back to Germany. Meanwhile a quarter of a year was gone, after which the said colonel, with all his household, was baptized again and provided with a fine nobleman’s estate and many serfs.
At that time there went out a decree that both among natives and foreigners no idlers should be allowed (and that with heavy penalties) as those that took the bread out of the mouth of the workers, and all strangers that would not work must quit the country in a month and the town in four-and-twenty hours. With that some fifty of us joined together with intent to make our way, with God’s help, through Podolia to Germany; yet were we not two hours gone from the town when we were caught up by certain Russian troopers, on the pretence that his Majesty was greatly displeased that we had impudently dared to band together in such great numbers, and to traverse his land at pleasure without passports, saying further that his Majesty would not be going beyond his rights in sending us all to Siberia for our insolent conduct. On the way back I learned how my business stood: for the commander of the troop told me plainly, the Czar would not let me forth of the country: and his sincere advice was that I should obey his Majesty’s most gracious will and join their religion, and (as the colonel had done) not despise a fine estate; assuring me also that if I refused this and would not live among them as a lord I must needs stay as a servant against my will: nor must his Majesty be blamed that he would not allow to depart from his country a man so skilful as the before-mentioned colonel had reported me to be. Then did I disparage mine own worth, and said the honourable colonel must surely have ascribed to me more arts, virtues, and knowledge than I possessed: ’twas true indeed I had come into the land to serve his Majesty the Czar and the worshipful Russian people, even at the risk of my life, against their enemies: but to change my religion, to that I could not resolve me: yet so far as I could in any wise serve his Majesty without burdening my conscience, I would not fail to do my utmost endeavour.
Then was I set apart from the rest and lodged with a merchant, where I was openly watched, yet daily provisioned from the court with rich food and costly liquors, and also daily had visitors that talked with me and now and again would invite me as a guest. In especial there was one to whose charge I had without doubt been chiefly commended, a crafty man, that entertained me daily with friendly talk; for now could I speak Russian pretty well. So he discoursed with me oftentimes of all manner of mechanic arts, as well as of engines of war and others, and of fortification and artillery practice. At last, after much beating about the bush to find out whether I would give in to his master’s wishes, when he found there was no hope of my changing even in the least point, he begged that I would for the honour of the great Czar impart and communicate to their nation somewhat of my science: for his Majesty would requite my complaisance with high and royal favours. To which I answered, my desires had ever been to that end, most dutifully to serve the Czar, seeing that for this purpose I had come into his country, albeit I perceived that I was kept like a prisoner. But he replied, “Nay, nay, sir, ye be no prisoner, but his Majesty doth hold ye so dear that he cannot resolve to part with your person.” So says I, “Wherefore then am I guarded?” “Because,” he answered, “his Majesty feareth lest any harm should happen to ye.”
So now understanding my proposals, he said the Czar was graciously pleased to consider of digging for saltpetre in his own country and making of powder there; but because there was no one in the land that could deal with the matter, I should do him an acceptable service if I would undertake the work: to that end I should be provided with men and means enough ready to hand, and he in his own person would most sincerely beg of me not to reject such a gracious proposal, seeing that they were already well assured that I had a full knowledge of such matters. To which I answered, “Sir, I say as I said before: if I can serve his Majesty in anything, provided only he will be graciously content to leave me undisturbed in my religion, I will not fail to do my best.” Whereat the Russian, which was one of their chief magnates, was heartily glad and pledged me in drink deeper than ever a German.
Next day there came from the Czar two great nobles with an interpreter to make a final agreement with me, and presented me on behalf of the Czar with a costly Russian robe: and a few days after I began to seek for saltpetre and to instruct the Russians that had been assigned to me how to separate it from the earth and refine it; and at the same time I drew up a plan of a powder-mill, and taught others to burn charcoal, so that in brief space we had ready a goodly amount both of musket and ordnance powder; for I had people enough, besides mine own servants that were to wait on me, or, to speak more truly, to keep watch and ward over me.
I being thus well started, there comes to me the before-mentioned colonel in Russian clothes and nobly escorted by many servants; without doubt by such a show of glory to persuade me to go over to that religion. But I knew well that the clothes came from the Czar his wardrobe, and were but lent him to make my mouth water: for ’tis the commonest of customs at the Russian court: and that the reader may understand how ’tis managed, I will give him an instance of mine own self. For once was I busied with taking order at the powder-mills (which I caused to be built on the river outside Moscow) as to what task one and the other of the people assigned to me should perform that day and the next, when of a sudden there was an alarm that the Tartars, 100,000 horse strong, were but four miles away plundering the country and advancing continually: so must I and my people needs betake ourselves to the palace, to be equipped out of the Czar’s armoury and stables. And I for my part, in place of a cuirass, was clad in a quilted silk breastplate that would stop any arrow, but could not keep out any bullet: moreover boots and spurs and a princely headdress with a heron plume, and a sabre that would split a hair, mounted with pure gold and studded with precious stones, were given to me, and of the Czar’s horses such an one was put between my legs as I had never seen the like of in my life, far less ridden; so I and my horses blazed with gold, silver, pearls and precious stones. I had a steel mace hanging by me that shone like a mirror, and was so well made and heavy that I had easily beaten to death any that I dealt a blow with it, so that the Czar himself could not ride into battle better equipped: and there followed me a white standard with a double eagle to which the people flocked from all sides and corners, so that before two hours were over we were forty thousand strong and after four hours nigh sixty thousand, with whom we marched against the Tartars; and every quarter of an hour I had my orders from the Czar; which yet were but this, that I should this day approve myself a soldier, having given myself out for one, that his Majesty might as such esteem and recognise me. So every moment our troop was increased with great and small soldiers and officers; yet in all this haste could I discover none that should command the whole body, or array the battle. It needs not that I should tell all, for my story is not much concerned with this encounter. I will but say this only, that we came suddenly upon the Tartars in a valley or deep dip in the land, encumbered with tired horses and much booty, and least of all expecting us; whom we attacked on all sides with such fury that at the very onset we scattered them. There at the first attack I called to my followers in the Russian speech, “Come now, let each do as I do!” and that they all shouted to one another, while I with a loose rein charged at the enemy, and of the first I met, which was a Mirza or prince’s son, I cleft the head in twain, so that his brains were left hanging on my steel mace. This heroical example did the Russians follow, so that the Tartars might not withstand their attack, but turned to a general flight, while I dealt like a madman, or rather like one that from desperation seeketh death and cannot find it, for I smote down all that came before me, Tartar and Russian alike; and they that were commanded by the Czar to watch me followed me so hard that I had ever my back guarded. There was the air so full of arrows as it had been swarms of bees, of which my share was one in the arm; for I had turned back my sleeve that so with less hindrance I might use my sword and came to cleave and batter; and until I received the wound my heart did laugh within me at such bloodshed; but when I saw mine own blood flow, that laughter was turned into a mad fury.
So when these savage foes had been put to flight, it was commanded me by divers nobles in the name of the Czar that I should carry to their emperor the news how the Tartars had been defeated: and at their bidding I rode back with some hundred horsemen at my heels, with whom I rode through the town to the Czar’s palace, and was by all men received with triumph and gratulation; but so soon as I had made my report of the battle (albeit the Czar had already news of all that happened) I must again doff my princely apparel, which was again stored away in the Czar his wardrobe, though both it and the horse trappings were bespattered and befouled all over with blood and so almost entirely ruinated; whereas I had thought, since I had borne myself so knightly in the encounter, the clothes should at least have been left me, together with the horse, for a reward. But from this I could well judge how ’twas managed with the Russian robe of state of which my colonel made use; for ’tis all but lent finery which, like all else in Russia, pertaineth to the Czar alone.