XX + 

How They Hired a Fair Cookmaid and by God’s Help Were Rid of Her Again + 

This was the first meal of which we partook upon our island; and having ended it, we had naught else to do but gather dry wood to keep up our fire. We would fain have explored the whole island at once, but by reason of the fatigue we had passed through, sleep so overpowered us that we must needs lie down to rest and sleep till broad daylight. And finding it so, we walked down the brook or glade as far as its mouth where it flows into the sea, and saw with amazement how a great multitude of fish of the size of middling salmon or large carp swam up the little river into the fresh water, so that it seemed as a great herd of swine were driven violently in; and finding also certain bananas and sweet potatoes, which be excellent fruits, we said to each other we had surely found the Land of Cocaigne or Monkeys’ Paradise, (though no four-footed beast there) if we had but company to help us to enjoy both the fruitfulness of this noble island and also the plenty of birds and fishes on it: yet could we find no single sign that ever men had been there. + 

But as we began to take counsel how we should further order our housekeeping and whence we might have vessels wherein both to cook and to catch the juice from the palms and let it ferment in its own fashion, that we might have the full enjoyment of it, and as we walked on the shore in talk of this, we saw far out at sea something that tossed about, which we at a distance could not make out, though it seemed bigger than it really was. For when it came near and was driven ashore on the coast of the island it proved to be a woman, half-dead, lying on a chest, and with both hands fast clasped to the handles of it. Her for Christian charity we drew to dry land; and dreaming her to be a Christian woman of Abyssinia both by her clothing and certain marks she had on her face, we were the more busy to bring her to, to which end (yet with all honesty, as becomes them that deal with modest women in such a case) we set her on her head till a good deal of water had run out of her, and albeit we had no cordial to revive her more than our citron-juice, yet we ceased not to press under her nose that spirituous liquor which is found at the very end of the lemon-peel and to shake and move her about, till at last she began to stir of herself and to speak in Portuguese: which as soon as my comrade heard, and as a lively colour began to show itself in her face, he said to me, “This Abyssinian was once on our ship as maid to a Portuguese lady of quality; for I knew them both well: they dwelt at Macao and were purposed to sail with us to the Isle of Annabon.” And she, so soon as she heard him speak, showed herself right glad, and called him by name, and told us not only of her whole journey, but how she was rejoiced both that he and she were still alive, as also that they had as old acquaintances met on dry land and out of all danger. At that my carpenter asked what manner of wares might be in the chest. To which she answered they were certain parcels of Chinese apparel with firearms and weapons, besides divers vessels of porcelain both small and great, that should have been sent by her master to a great prince in Portugal. At which news we rejoiced greatly, seeing that these were the things which we most needed. Then did she beg of us that we would show her kindness and keep her with us: for she would gladly serve us in cooking, washing, and other duties of a maid and obey us as a slave, if we would but keep her under our protection and suffer her to partake with us of the sustenance which fortune and nature provided in that place. + 

So with great toil and trouble we dragged the chest to that place which we had chosen for our dwelling; where we did open it, and found therein things so fitted to our needs that we could have desired nothing better for our then condition and for the use of our household. These goods we unpacked and dried them in the sun, in which business our new maid showed herself diligent and serviceable; and thereafter we began to slay, boil, and roast birds, and while my carpenter went to fetch palm-wine I climbed up the mountain to gather eggs for us, meaning to boil them hard and to use them in place of good bread. And as I went I considered with hearty gratitude the great gifts and goodness of God, that had with such fatherly kindness caused His Providence to watch over us and gave us the promise of further help. There did I fall upon my face, and stretching out my arms and lifting up my heart to God I prayed thus: “O heavenly Father of all mercies, now do I find indeed that Thou art more ready to give than we to ask; yea, dearest Lord, Thou hast with the fullness of Thy divine riches supplied us more quickly and more plentifully than we poor creatures ever thought to ask of Thee at all. O faithful Father, may it please Thy infinite compassion to grant to us that we may never use these Thy gifts and favours otherwise than as is agreeable to thy Holy will and pleasure, and as may tend to the honour of Thy great and unspeakable Name, that we, with all the Elect, may ever praise, honour, and glorify Thee here on earth and hereafter in heaven forever and forevermore.” And with these and the like words, which flowed from the very depth of my soul, with hearty and true faith, I went on till I had gathered all the eggs we needed, and with them came back to our hut even as our supper stood excellently well served upon the chest we had that day fished out of the sea with our cookmaid, and which my comrade had made use of for a table. + 

Now while I was absent seeking for eggs, my comrade, which was a lad of some twenty odd years, I being now over forty, had struck a bargain with our maid that should be both for his ruin and mine; for finding themselves alone in my absence, and talking together of old times and also of the fruitfulness and great delight of this blessed, yea more than fortunate isle, they had grown so familiar that they had begun to speak of a match between them, of which the pretended Abyssinian would not hear, unless ’twere agreed that my comrade the carpenter should make himself master of the island and rid them of me; for, said she, it were impossible for them to dwell in peace in wedlock so long as an unmarried man lived by them. + 

“For bethink thyself,” says she, “how would not suspicion and jealousy plague thee, if thou wert my husband, and yet the old fellow talking with me day by day, even if he should never think to make a cuckold of thee! Nay, but I know a better plan: if I be to be married on this island, that well can feed a thousand or more persons to increase the human race, then let the old fellow marry me; for were it so ’twere but a year to count on, or perhaps twelve or at most fourteen, in which time he and I might breed a daughter and marry her to thee, who would not then be of the age that the old man is now; and in the meantime ye might cherish the certain hope that the one should be the other’s father-in-law and the other his son-in-law, and so do away all evil suspicions and deliver me from all dangers which otherwise I might encounter with. Doubtless ’tis true that a young woman like me would sooner wed with a young man than an old: yet must we suit ourselves to the circumstance as our present plight doth require, to provide that I and she that may be born of me shall be in safety.” + 

By this discourse, which lasted much longer and was more fully set forth than I have here described, and also by the beauty of the pretended Abyssinian (which in the light of the fire did shine more perfect than ever in my comrade’s eyes) and by her lively actions, my good carpenter was so captivated and befooled that he was not ashamed to say he would sooner throw the old man (meaning me) into the sea and send the whole island to the devil than deliver over to him so fair a lady: and thereupon was the bargain I spoke of concluded between them, namely, that he should slay me with his axe from behind or in my sleep; for he was afeared of my great strength of body, as well as of my staff, which he had himself fashioned for me as strong as a weaver’s beam. + 

So this compact being made, she showed my comrade close to our dwelling a kind of fine potter’s earth, of which she promised to make fine earthen vessels after the manner of the Indian women on the Guinea coast, and laid all manner of plans how she would maintain herself and her family on this island, rear them and provide for them a peaceful and sufficient livelihood, yea even to the hundredth generation: and could not boast enough of what profit she could make of the coconut-trees and the cotton which the same do bear or produce, out of which she would provide herself and all her children’s children with clothing. + 

But I, poor wretch, came knowing no word of this foul business, and sat down to enjoy what was yet before me, saying moreover, according to the worshipful Christian usage, the Benedicite; yet no sooner had I made the sign of the Cross over the meats and over my companions at table and asked God’s blessing, when our cookmaid vanished away with the chest and all that had been in it, and left behind her such an horrible stench that my comrade fainted clean away because of it. + 