The Wooer + 

In Ballybazoo the young men woo + 

With the irresistible hob-nail shoe; + 

But in Ghargharoo lived a maiden who + 

Was pleased to remark that it wouldn’t do. + 

From Ghargharoo to Ballybazoo + 

This sternly dissenting maiden (who, + 

Etc.) went to reside⁠—a lass + 

With a cheek of steel and a brow of brass. + 

Then all the young men of Ballybazoo + 

Took turns in calling early to woo + 

(With the irresistible hob-nail shoe) + 

The beautiful maiden from Ghargharoo. + 

As each fond lover with ardor threw + 

His heel in her upturned face there flew + 

A rain of sparks that consumed his eyes, + 

Affecting his mind with a great surprise. + 

When all the young men had renounced their sight, + 

The metal-faced maiden she sat upright, + 

Remarking: “There’s nothing here to do⁠— + 

A dull, dull village is Ballybazoo.” + 

From Ballybazoo to Ghargharoo + 

The cheek-whole maiden her armament drew, + 

And her playmate lovers raised a hurroo + 

That saddened the sightless in Ballybazoo. + 

A stranger there was who cherished a heel + 

Of double-case-hardened, cold-rolled chrome steel! + 

And taking thought he decided to woo. + 

As ’twas his undoubted right to do. + 

To display his charms he removed his shoe, + 

And boarding her visage, began to woo. + 

And there in the gloaming, and not in vain, + 

The old, old story was told again. + 

It was long ago in the sainted past, + 

But traits long latent crop out at last; + 

And I know a live newspaper fellow who + 

Has ancestors buried in Ghargharoo. + 