II
I
Carey Lodge was the name of MyraтАЩs house. It was about eight miles from Birmingham.
A subtle depression always weighed down VernonтАЩs spirits as he got near Carey Lodge. He hated the house, hated its solid comfort, its thick bright red carpets, its lounge hall, the carefully selected sporting prints that hung in the dining-room, the superabundance of knickknacks that filled the drawing-room. And yet, was it so much those things he hated as the facts that stood behind them?
He questioned himself, trying for the first time to be honest with himself. WasnтАЩt it the truth that he hated his mother being so at home there, so placidly content? He liked to think of her in terms of Abbots PuissantsтБатАФliked to think of her as being, like himself, an exile.
And she wasnтАЩt! Abbots Puissants had been to her what a foreign kingdom might be to a Queen Consort. She had felt important there, and pleased with herself. It had been new and exciting. But it hadnтАЩt been home.
Myra greeted her son with extravagant affection as always. He wished she wouldnтАЩt. In some way it made it harder than ever for him to respond. When he was away from her, he pictured himself being affectionate to his mother. When he was with her, all that illusion faded away.
Myra Deyre had altered a good deal since leaving Abbots Puissants. She had grown much stouter. Her beautiful golden-red hair was flecked with grey. The expression of her face was different, it was at once more satisfied and more placid. There was now a strong resemblance between her and her brother Sydney.
тАЬYouтАЩve had a good time in London? IтАЩm so glad. ItтАЩs so exciting to have my fine big son back with meтБатАФIтАЩve been telling everybody how excited I am. Mothers are foolish creatures, arenтАЩt they?тАЭ
Vernon thought they were ratherтБатАФthen was ashamed of himself.
тАЬVery jolly to see you, Mother,тАЭ he mumbled.
Joe said: тАЬYouтАЩre looking splendidly fit, Aunt Myra.тАЭ
тАЬIтАЩve not really been very well, dear. I donтАЩt think Dr.┬аGrey quite understands my case. I hear thereтАЩs a new doctorтБатАФDr.┬аLittleworthтБатАФjust bought Dr.┬аArmstrongтАЩs practice. They say he is wonderfully clever. IтАЩm sure itтАЩs my heartтБатАФand itтАЩs all nonsense Dr.┬аGrey saying itтАЩs indigestion.тАЭ
She was quite animated. Her health was always an absorbing topic to Myra.
тАЬMaryтАЩs goneтБатАФthe housemaid, you know. I was really very disappointed in that girl. After all I did for her.тАЭ
It went on and on. Joe and Vernon listened perfunctorily. Their minds were full of conscious superiority. Thank Heaven they belonged to a new and enlightened generation, far above this insistence on domestic details. For them, a new and splendid world opened out. They were deeply, poignantly sorry for the contented creature who sat there chattering to them.
Joe thought: тАЬPoorтБатАФpoor Aunt Myra. So terribly female! Of course Uncle Walter got bored with her. Not her fault! A rotten education, and brought up to believe that domesticity was all that mattered. And here she is, still young reallyтБатАФat least not too terribly oldтБатАФand all sheтАЩs got to do is to sit in the house and gossip, and think about servants, and fuss about her health. If sheтАЩd only been born twenty years later, she could have been happy and free and independent all her life.тАЭ
And out of her intense pity for her unconscious aunt she answered gently and pretended an interest that she certainly did not feel.
Vernon thought: тАЬWas Mother always like this? Somehow she didnтАЩt seem so at Abbots Puissants. Or was I too much of a kid to notice? ItтАЩs rotten of me to criticize her when sheтАЩs been so good to me always. Only I wish she wouldnтАЩt treat me still as though I were about six years old. Oh, well, I suppose she canтАЩt help it. I donтАЩt think I shall ever marry.тАЭ
And suddenly he jerked out abruptly, urged thereto by intense nervousness.
тАЬI say, Mother. IтАЩm thinking of taking music at Cambridge.тАЭ
There, it was out! He had said it.
Myra, distracted from her account of the ArmstrongsтАЩ cook, said vaguely:
тАЬBut, darling, you always were so unmusical. You used to be quite unreasonable about it.тАЭ
тАЬI know,тАЭ said Vernon gruffly. тАЬBut one changes oneтАЩs mind about things sometimes.тАЭ
тАЬWell, IтАЩm very glad, dear. I used to play quite brilliant pieces myself when I was a young girl. But one never keeps up anything when one marries.тАЭ
тАЬI know. ItтАЩs a wicked shame,тАЭ said Joe hotly. тАЬI donтАЩt mean to marryтБатАФbut if I did, IтАЩd never give up my own career. And that reminds me, Aunt Myra, IтАЩve just got to go to London to study if IтАЩm ever going to be any good at modelling.тАЭ
тАЬIтАЩm sure Mr.┬аBradfordтБатАФтАЭ
тАЬOh, damn Mr.┬аBradford! IтАЩm sorry, Aunt Myra, but you donтАЩt understand. IтАЩve got to studyтБатАФhard. And I must be on my own. I could share diggings with another girlтБатАФтАЭ
тАЬJoe, darling, donтАЩt be so absurd.тАЭ Myra laughed. тАЬI need my little Joe here. I always look on you as my daughter, you know, Joe, dear.тАЭ
Joe wriggled.
тАЬI really am in earnest, Aunt Myra. ItтАЩs my whole life.тАЭ
This tragic utterance only made her aunt laugh more.
тАЬGirls often think like that. Now donтАЩt letтАЩs spoil this happy evening by quarrelling.тАЭ
тАЬBut will you really seriously consider it?тАЭ
тАЬWe must see what Uncle Sydney says.тАЭ
тАЬItтАЩs nothing to do with him. HeтАЩs not my uncle. Surely, if I like, I can take my own money.тАЭ
тАЬIt isnтАЩt exactly your own money, Joe. Your father sends it to me as an allowance for youтБатАФthough IтАЩm sure I would be willing to have you without any allowance at allтБатАФand knows you are well and safely looked after with me.тАЭ
тАЬThen I suppose IтАЩd better write to Father.тАЭ
She said it valiantly, but her heart sank. She had seen her father twice in ten years, and the old antagonism held between them. The present plan doubtless commended itself to Major Waite. At the cost of a few hundreds a year, the problem of his daughter was lifted off his hands. But Joe had no money of her own. She doubted very much if her father would make her any allowance at all if she broke away from Aunt Myra and insisted on leading her own life.
Vernon murmured to her: тАЬDonтАЩt be so damned impatient, Joe. Wait till IтАЩm twenty-one.тАЭ
That cheered her a little. One could always depend on Vernon.
Myra asked Vernon about the Levinnes. Was Mrs.┬аLevinneтАЩs asthma any better? Was it true that they spent almost all of their time in London nowadays?
тАЬNo, I donтАЩt think so. Of course, they donтАЩt go down to Deerfields much in the winter, but they were there all the autumn. ItтАЩll be jolly to have them next door when we go back to Abbots Puissants, wonтАЩt it?тАЭ
His mother started, and said in a flustered sort of voice:
тАЬOh! yesтБатАФvery nice.тАЭ
She added almost immediately:
тАЬYour Uncle Sydney is coming round to tea. HeтАЩs bringing Enid. By the way, I donтАЩt have late dinner any more. I really think it suits me better to have a good sit-down meal at six.тАЭ
тАЬOh!тАЭ said Vernon, rather taken aback.
He had an unreasoning prejudice against those meals. He disliked the juxtaposition of tea and scrambled eggs, and rich plum cake. Why couldnтАЩt his mother have proper meals like other people? Of course, Uncle Sydney and Aunt Carrie always had high tea. Bother Uncle Sydney! All this was his fault.
His thought stoppedтБатАФchecked. All what? He couldnтАЩt answerтБатАФdidnтАЩt quite know. But, anyway, when he and his mother went back to Abbots Puissants, everything would be different.
II
Uncle Sydney arrived very soonтБатАФvery bluff and hearty, a little stouter than of old. With him came Enid, his third daughter. The two eldest were married, and the two youngest were in the schoolroom.
Uncle Sydney was full of jokes and fun. Myra looked at her brother admiringly. Really, there was nobody like Syd! He made things go.
Vernon laughed politely at his uncleтАЩs jokes which he privately thought both stupid and boring.
тАЬI wonder where you buy your tobacco in Cambridge,тАЭ said Uncle Sydney. тАЬFrom a pretty girl, IтАЩll be bound. Ha! Ha! Myra, the boyтАЩs blushingтБатАФactually blushing.тАЭ
тАЬStupid old fool,тАЭ thought Vernon disdainfully.
тАЬAnd where do you buy your tobacco, Uncle Sydney?тАЭ said Joe, valiantly entering the lists.
тАЬHa! Ha!тАЭ trumpeted Uncle Sydney. тАЬThatтАЩs a good one! YouтАЩre a smart girl, Joe. We wonтАЩt tell your Aunt Carrie the answer to that, eh?тАЭ
Enid said very little but giggled a good deal.
тАЬYou ought to write to your cousin,тАЭ said Uncle Sydney. тАЬHeтАЩd like a letter, wouldnтАЩt you, Vernon?тАЭ
тАЬRather,тАЭ said Vernon.
тАЬThere you are,тАЭ said Uncle Sydney. тАЬWhat did I tell you, miss? The child wanted to, but was shy. SheтАЩs always thought a lot of you, Vernon. But I mustnтАЩt tell tales out of school, hey, Enid?тАЭ
Later, after the heavy composite meal was ended, he talked to Vernon at some length of the prosperity of BentтАЩs.
тАЬBooming, my boy, booming.тАЭ
He went into long financial explanations: profits had doubled, he was extending the premisesтБатАФand so on and so on.
Vernon much preferred this style of conversation. Not being the least interested, he could abstract his attention. An encouraging monosyllable from time to time was all that was needed.
Uncle Sydney talked on, developing the fascinating theme of the Power and Glory of BentтАЩs, World without End, Amen.
Vernon thought about the book on musical instruments which he had bought that morning and read coming down in the train. There was a terrible lot to know. OboesтБатАФhe felt he was going to have ideas about oboes. And violasтБатАФyes, certainly, violas.
Uncle SydneyтАЩs talk made a pleasant accompaniment like a remote double bass.
Presently Uncle Sydney said he must be getting along. There was more facetiousnessтБатАФshould or should not Vernon kiss Enid good night?
How idiotic people were. Thank goodness heтАЩd soon be able to get up to his own room.
Myra heaved a happy sigh as the door closed.
тАЬDear me,тАЭ she murmured, тАЬI wish your father had been here. WeтАЩve had such a happy evening. He would have enjoyed it.тАЭ
тАЬA jolly good thing he wasnтАЩt,тАЭ said Vernon. тАЬI donтАЩt remember he and Uncle Sydney ever hitting it off really well.тАЭ
тАЬYou were only a little boy. They were the greatest of friends, and your father was always happy when I was. Oh, dear, how happy we were together.тАЭ
She raised a handkerchief to her eyes. Vernon stared at her. For a moment he thought: тАЬThis is the most magnificent loyalty.тАЭ And then suddenly: тАЬNo, it isnтАЩt. She really believes it.тАЭ
Myra went on in a soft reminiscent tone.
тАЬYou were never really fond of your father, Vernon. I think it must have grieved him sometimes. But then, you were so devoted to me. It was quite ridiculous.тАЭ
Vernon said suddenly and violently, and with a strange feeling that he was defending his father by saying so:
тАЬFather was a brute to you.тАЭ
тАЬVernon, how dare you say such a thing. Your father was the best man in the world.тАЭ
She looked at him defiantly. He thought: тАЬSheтАЩs seeing herself being heroic. тАШHow wonderful a womanтАЩs love can beтБатАФprotecting her deadтАЩтБатАФthat sort of thing. Oh! I hate it all. I hate it all.тАЭ
He mumbled something, kissed her, and went up to bed.
III
Later in the evening Joe tapped at his door and was bidden to enter. Vernon was sitting, sprawled out in a chair. The book on musical instruments lay on the floor beside him.
тАЬHullo, Joe. God, what a beastly evening!тАЭ
тАЬDid you mind it so much?тАЭ
тАЬDidnтАЩt you? ItтАЩs all wrong. What an ass Uncle Sydney is. Those idiotic jokes! ItтАЩs all so cheap.тАЭ
тАЬHтАЩm,тАЭ said Joe. She sat down thoughtfully on the bed and lit a cigarette.
тАЬDonтАЩt you agree?тАЭ
тАЬYesтБатАФat least I do in a way.тАЭ
тАЬSpit it out,тАЭ said Vernon encouragingly.
тАЬWell, what I mean is, theyтАЩre happy enough.тАЭ
тАЬWho?тАЭ
тАЬAunt Myra. Uncle Sydney. Enid. TheyтАЩre a united happy lot, thoroughly content with one another. ItтАЩs we who are wrong, Vernon. You and I. WeтАЩve lived here all these yearsтБатАФbut we donтАЩt belong. ThatтАЩs whyтБатАФweтАЩve got to get out of it.тАЭ
Vernon nodded thoughtfully.
тАЬYes, Joe, youтАЩre right. WeтАЩve got to get out of it.тАЭ He smiled happily, because the way was so clear. Twenty-oneтБатАКтБатАж Abbots PuissantsтБатАКтБатАж Music.