XXV
The drawbridge being held irreparable, Trim was ordered directly to set about anotherвБ†вЄїbut not upon the same model: for cardinal AlberoniвАЩs intrigues at that time being discovered, and my uncle Toby rightly foreseeing that a flame would inevitably break out betwixt Spain and the Empire, and that the operations of the ensuing campaign must in all likelihood be either in Naples or SicilyвБ†вЄЇвБ†he determined upon an Italian bridgeвБ†вАФ(my uncle Toby, by the by, was not far out of his conjectures)вБ†вЄЇвБ†but my father, who was infinitely the better politician, and took the lead as far of my uncle Toby in the cabinet, as my uncle Toby took it of him in the fieldвБ†вЄїconvinced him, that if the king of Spain and the Emperor went together by the ears, England and France and Holland must, by force of their pre-engagements, all enter the lists too;вБ†вЄЇвБ†and if so, he would say, the combatants, brother Toby, as sure as we are alive, will fall to it again, pell-mell, upon the old prizefighting stage of Flanders;вБ†вАФthen what will you do with your Italian bridge?
вАФWe will go on with it then upon the old model, cried my uncle Toby.
When Corporal Trim had about half finished it in that styleвБ†вЄЇвБ†my uncle Toby found out a capital defect in it, which he had never thoroughly considered before. It turned, it seems, upon hinges at both ends of it, opening in the middle, one half of which turning to one side of the fosse, and the other to the other; the advantage of which was this, that by dividing the weight of the bridge into two equal portions, it impowered my uncle Toby to raise it up or let it down with the end of his crutch, and with one hand, which, as his garrison was weak, was as much as he could well spareвБ†вАФbut the disadvantages of such a construction were insurmountable;вБ†вЄЇвБ†for by this means, he would say, I leave one half of my bridge in my enemyвАЩs possessionвБ†вЄЇвБ†and pray of what use is the other?
The natural remedy for this was, no doubt, to have his bridge fast only at one end with hinges, so that the whole might be lifted up together, and stand bolt uprightвБ†вЄїbut that was rejected for the reason given above.
For a whole week after he was determined in his mind to have one of that particular construction which is made to draw back horizontally, to hinder a passage; and to thrust forwards again to gain a passageвБ†вАФof which sorts your worship might have seen three famous ones at Spires before its destructionвБ†вАФand one now at Brisac, if I mistake not;вБ†вАФbut my father advising my uncle Toby, with great earnestness, to have nothing more to do with thrusting bridgesвБ†вАФand my uncle foreseeing moreover that it would but perpetuate the memory of the CorporalвАЩs misfortuneвБ†вАФhe changed his mind for that of the marquis dвАЩH√іpitalвАЩs invention, which the younger Bernouilli has so well and learnedly described, as your worships may seeвБ†вЄїAct. Erud. Lips. an. 1695вБ†вАФto these a lead weight is an eternal balance, and keeps watch as well as a couple of sentinels, inasmuch as the construction of them was a curve line approximating to a cycloidвБ†вЄїif not a cycloid itself.
My uncle Toby understood the nature of a parabola as well as any man in EnglandвБ†вАФbut was not quite such a master of the cycloid;вБ†вЄЇвБ†he talked however about it every dayвБ†вЄЇвБ†the bridge went not forwards.вБ†вЄЇвБ†WeвАЩll ask somebody about it, cried my uncle Toby to Trim.