XVIII
Obadiah gained the two crowns without dispute; for he came in jingling, with all the instruments in the green bays bag we spoke of, slung across his body, just as Corporal Trim went out of the room.
It is now proper, I think, quoth Dr. Slop (clearing up his looks), as we are in a condition to be of some service to Mrs. Shandy, to send upstairs to know how she goes on.
I have ordered, answered my father, the old midwife to come down to us upon the least difficulty;вБ†вАФfor you must know, Dr.¬†Slop, continued my father, with a perplexed kind of a smile upon his countenance, that by express treaty, solemnly ratified between me and my wife, you are no more than an auxiliary in this affair,вБ†вАФand not so much as that,вБ†вАФunless the lean old mother of a midwife above stairs cannot do without you.вБ†вАФWomen have their particular fancies, and in points of this nature, continued my father, where they bear the whole burden, and suffer so much acute pain for the advantage of our families, and the good of the species,вБ†вАФthey claim a right of deciding, en Souveraines, in whose hands, and in what fashion, they choose to undergo it.
They are in the right of it,вБ†вЄЇвБ†quoth my uncle Toby. But, Sir, replied Dr.¬†Slop, not taking notice of my uncle TobyвАЩs opinion, but turning to my father,вБ†вАФthey had better govern in other points;вБ†вЄЇвБ†and a father of a family, who wishes its perpetuity, in my opinion, had better exchange this prerogative with them, and give up some other rights in lieu of it.вБ†вЄЇвБ†I know not, quoth my father, answering a little too testily, to be quite dispassionate in what he said,вБ†вАФI know not, quoth he, what we have left to give up, in lieu of who shall bring our children into the world, unless that,вБ†вАФof who shall beget them.вБ†вЄїOne would almost give up anything, replied Dr.¬†Slop.вБ†вАФI beg your pardon,вБ†вЄЇвБ†answered my uncle Toby.вБ†вАФSir, replied Dr.¬†Slop, it would astonish you to know what improvements we have made of late years in all branches of obstetrical knowledge, but particularly in that one single point of the safe and expeditious extraction of the f≈Уtus,вБ†вЄЇвБ†which has received such lights, that, for my part (holding up his hands) I declare I wonder how the world hasвБ†вЄЇвБ†I wish, quoth my uncle Toby, you had seen what prodigious armies we had in Flanders.