XI
Writing, when properly managed (as you may be sure I think mine is) is but a different name for conversation. As no one, who knows what he is about in good company, would venture to talk all;вБ†вЄЇвБ†so no author, who understands the just boundaries of decorum and good-breeding, would presume to think all: The truest respect which you can pay to the readerвАЩs understanding, is to halve this matter amicably, and leave him something to imagine, in his turn, as well as yourself.
For my own part, I am eternally paying him compliments of this kind, and do all that lies in my power to keep his imagination as busy as my own.
вАЩTis his turn now;вБ†вАФI have given an ample description of Dr.¬†SlopвАЩs sad overthrow, and of his sad appearance in the back-parlour;вБ†вАФhis imagination must now go on with it for a while.
Let the reader imagine then, that Dr.¬†Slop has told his taleвБ†вАФand in what words, and with what aggravations, his fancy chooses;вБ†вАФLet him suppose, that Obadiah has told his tale also, and with such rueful looks of affected concern, as he thinks best will contrast the two figures as they stand by each other.вБ†вЄЇвБ†Let him imagine, that my father has stepped upstairs to see my mother.вБ†вАФAnd, to conclude this work of imaginationвБ†вАФlet him imagine the doctor washed,вБ†вАФrubbed down, and condoled,вБ†вАФfelicitated,вБ†вАФgot into a pair of ObadiahвАЩs pumps, stepping forwards towards the door, upon the very point of entering upon action.
Truce!вБ†вАФtruce, good Dr.¬†Slop:вБ†вАФstay thy obstetrick hand;вБ†вЄЇвБ†return it safe into thy bosom to keep it warm;вБ†вЄЇвБ†little dost thou know what obstacles,вБ†вЄїlittle dost thou think what hidden causes, retard its operation!вБ†вЄЇвБ†Hast thou, Dr.¬†Slop,вБ†вАФhast thou been entrusted with the secret articles of the solemn treaty which has brought thee into this place?вБ†вАФArt thou aware that at this instant, a daughter of Lucina is put obstetrically over thy head? Alas!вБ†вАФвАЩtis too true.вБ†вАФBesides, great son of Pilumnus! what canst thou do?вБ†вАФThou hast come forth unarmвАЩd;вБ†вАФthou hast left thy tire-t√™te,вБ†вАФthy new-invented forceps,вБ†вАФthy crotchet,вБ†вАФthy squirt, and all thy instruments of salvation and deliverance, behind thee,вБ†вАФBy Heaven! at this moment they are hanging up in a green bays bag, betwixt thy two pistols, at the bedвАЩs head!вБ†вАФRing;вБ†вАФcall;вБ†вАФsend Obadiah back upon the coach-horse to bring them with all speed.
вЄЇвБ†Make great haste, Obadiah, quoth my father, and IвАЩll give thee a crown!вБ†вАФand quoth my uncle Toby, IвАЩll give him another.